WIIWARE

I never thought Nintendo could make such a disaster, if it was them at all.

Back in 2006 and 2007, when I first bought my Wii, everyone was pretty hyped up. Not only Nintendo fans, but Sony and Microsoft fans too! By some time in march of 2008, Nintendo launched something new, and extremely cool! By this time, everyone had a Nintendo Wii console, and the games where not going to slow down now. The Wii Ware was officially announced. Games started popping on here since it came. Took a while to update, but it was worth it! When they first launched the virtual console list, I got my money and credit card, and started waisting! I could not believe it! Even though I’m a huge fan of emulators and what not, this was a big thing to me! I got games such as Contra, Super Mario World, Starfox. Everything was fine, until the release of one specific game. It had a banner of a game called “Super Mario Bros 3″. I freaking LOVE this game. Compared to the first 2 before it, my bro and I (Get it? Mario bro?) used to play 2 players a lot, see who got to the castle first. Anyways. I downloaded it. Didn’t take very long, like any other NES game on WiiWare. I couldn’t wait to go see it as a channel! I went straight to my HOME menu to see it, despite me still having 2800 Wii points still left, I left for my channel. I see it, along with 4 of my other newly bought games, it’s banner and all. I clicked it. It’s virtual console screen came up like usual with that little noise playing in the background with it. I hit start. For the first second, everything was fine. The curtain pulled up like usual. Showing Mario and Luigi on the screen. Instead of Luigi jumping on Mario, it was the opposite. But when he jumped on Luigi, he didn’t just do that, he literally killed him. Like he weighed 400 pounds or something. My brother was their too, so we laughed it off. It was actually quite hilarious. Seeing Luigi, that scared fucker, get his ass handed to him is funny to us people. I don’t know, what do you expect from some NES game, because it wouldn’t happen anywhere else. The thing that really made us laugh, was the stupid little blood that came out, and most of all: instead off all the object like koopa shell, goomba and what not fall random places, they all fell directly on top of Luigi. The logo that fell made us pretty frightened, though. It was funny, but it wasn’t. The logo fell on luigi, and crushed him. Some fake looking pixelized blood came out, but it literally crushed him. Luigi was dead. Mario appeared on screen again. I was frightened that he would do something like that. Like literally! Who the hell would make a game like this! Nintendo strikes again, is what went on in my brain. But this wasn’t again. This was new, this was REAL! Nintendo messed up this time. BAD! Anyways. Mario just walked to the logo and jumped on it. He stood their… well, forever. Then some words came on screen. It said “1 Player game”. Under that, instead of “2 Player game”, it was just a blank space. Under that, “1988 Nintendo”. I was horrified to actually see what the game had in store for me. I got my Wii remote and pressed !. Nothing happened because I didn’t know Wii remotes don’t work on Virtual Console. So I plugged in my Gamecube controller, and pressed A. The questionable thing was, was that their were no sound effects. Like the coin sound when you pressed “1 Player Game”, and the background music was not there. The game just faded a tiny bit and froze. And this happened like 10 seconds AFTER I pressed A. I was stuck looking at the gory logo with Mario standing on it looking directly at the screen. The koopas that happen to pass by that were basically floating shells, and the crushed Luigi. Usually, I’m not scared for a game. Definitely not Horror games. It just adds the mood the developer wants. But this was NON-Horror. Scared my shitless. By the time of mario appearing on screen before he jumped, my brother left the room for “I don’t fucking know why he didn’t stay to watch” reason. I was left looking at it. When it froze, though. It made the sound of game freezing when you are hacking Super Smash Bros. Brawl for it’s textures. Oh you gamers know how that sounds. It was damn sure loud! So anyways. At this time, I decided to just shut the damn game off. Just go on my computer and see if anyone else had the problem. None yet. I went back to my console to use the last of my 2800 or so points I had left over. I don’t fucking know WHAT happened, but the only thing on my HOME Menu, was the Wii Shop Channel and Super Mario Bros. 3 Channel. That channel I wasn’t giving 1 shit to go on. Because it was fucking creepy for Nintendo to do such a thing, and the logo, instead of the usual that would appear before you actually clicked the channel, was different. It was just some orange. Like the background of the title screen. There was no Mii Channel, None of the new games I bought was there, and the System Preferences was unclickable. Because I wanted to see if it still existed on my Hard Drive, because I would sue, even though I love Nintendo, for such an act! I finally got the guts to go on the Wii Shop channel. The channel appeared like usual, but it took me immediately to the download screen of Super Mario Bros. 3. Not the actual download screen of mario hitting the blocks, but the screen of the option to “Download Now”. I left that shit. I pressed cancelled. It took me to my “Activity” menu. As if I clicked it normally on the game I wanted to redownload. The Super Mario Bros. 3 game still had it’s Orange color screen as a logo. The rest of the like 4 other games I downloaded was still in my menu. I decided to just say “Fuck it. What other harm could this channel do. If all my fucking channels are gone, why not just make more?”. I redownloaded the other 4 in my history. I didn’t want to do this, but may be they had other Mario Bro. games. Like 1 and 2 or something? I set staring at 3 again. It was the only Mario game that showed up. the rest were, for some reason, Pokemon games. Beats me. I noticed that the Mario game had it’s logo back. It sure as hell didn’t when I rechecked my “activities” menu. I was wondering if anyone else experienced this same thing. So I went to Nintendo’s Consumer Service on their Nintendo website. The funny thing was, usually they would respond in a few days. But it was actually at least 30 minutes. During that time, I was just surfing the internet looking for some weird clue on if this is an actual channel to play and it just glitched on me, because it was some type of parody of the actual game, or if Nintendo is aiming for some sick desire and goal. The message sent in my GMAIL account read as fallows, ” We are happy you contacted us. The Nintendo WiiWare was released a little time ago, as of about a week, and you should know it probably still has bugs we don’t know about. If the problem persists in a few months from now, please contact us. new updates will be out sooner or later, and you should get all of your channels back then. Thanks you for your support! -Koller ” Well, what he said, I guess his name was Koller, did actually make sense. It was still glitchy a little since it’s a new thing for Nintendo. I get that, but really, all my channels are deleted? I’m lucky I didn’t have much on it, since the Wii was not much without WiiWare. i’m still pissed. Anyways, I messaged a few forums and boards of fan websites and what not. damn, Heh. I even messaged Nintendo hacking websites. Like Mods and shit. I’m still waiting for replies. I told the forums and what not the whole story. What I said to Nintendo was a simple: Hello, Nintendo. I recently used the Nintendo WiiWare service and was delighted. The only problem: I download a game and what happened was… It worked fine but it glitched and froze for some reason. I shut my system off and I came back and all of my channels, like Mii channel, were gone! please help!”. And that was it. I went into what happened int he game and shit. I am a bit pissed. None of the people believe me! They believe I’m just some troll. And going back to all the forums I’ve been to now, (Since I wrote the URL address on a piece of paper so I won’t forget incase someone helps) Most of the topics I made were just put down by admins. I became desperate. I went back to the Wii to play some of the redownloaded games. But still, nothing but the two apps! I was NOT going to waste any more money on this fucked up software! did Nintendo really cheat us! I still can’e believe it! it’s been out for a week now, and no complaints of this shit. That’s when something weird happened on my Wii. I decided to say “Fuck it!”. I went to go play the changed logo game. Super Mario Bros. 2. Instead of triggering the intro, it went straight to the first level. It didn’t show the map of the over world or anything. So, without waisting any time, I decided to so “It’s here… Let’s just play it. Probably the only time this will happen. I got lucky.” So, the game was normal. but the item boxes had no animation. A glitch may be? They weren’t even hittable. I JUMP RIGHT THROUGH THEM! So I just thought to my self to look on the bright side: A hardER Mario game to play. The funny thing was, was that the game went normally. as if what happened on the title screen never even happened, it’s just glitching now, or what not. So, I was at the end of the level, and ALMOST died. I then figure that the enemies are untouchable, too. Well. That pooped it for me. I won the level normally. That’s when shit started hitting the fan! The overworld map was glitched up like FUCKING CRAZY! It wasn’t only the textures, but MY animation! The textures were overlapping, and constantly flicking the screen. I was just sliding, instead of that wacko little walk I do while facing the screen. I was constantly appearing and disappearing onscreen, because the textures overlapped me. I played the second level, and all the enemy textures were glitches, to a point where they were looking as if they were a different shape. I just continued the level, because what the fuck could a game do to me but waist my damn money? I wasn’t usually scared of anything, but this gave me some chills. I decided to not play this game much more. I fell in a whole on the second level and I just fell forever. Nothing happened but it stayed on the screen forever. As if there wasn’t a properly placed death pit. And I could still recall me hitting an invisible wall, as if the game wanted me to go down there. I don’t know. Fucked up level placement, I guess. I headed back to my computer, and went back to the rest of the sites on my list I didn’t check. No luck. But on one of the sites, I actually almost didn’t notice. I almost exited the website. I had an inbox. I assumed it was like a welcome inbox, since I signed up for many websites just to ask a damn question. I went ahead and pressed it. There were two inboxes. One said the default saying, if you didn’t have a title. Which was “” I decided to go to the other one first, which had a subject of “hly carp bro!”. I looked at it and easily determined it was some kid, or someone who needed spelling lessons. But this wasn’t the case. He said he was “In a hurry”. Here’s the note: “woah ma i had he same ti happn t me! i playe mario 3and it did the sam. i can t doload anthin. sorry for my tpng, but im in a hrry. wl talk tomaro!” And that was it. No hints. Just “He has the same”. So much for my luck. Time to read the creepy no subject letter sent. This crap creeped me out instantly! All it read was “YOU’RE GETTING BETTER.”. It was sent by a username of “00″. I was freaked. Maybe it was an old user, because after me signing up, it sure wouldn’t let me use letters under 6, and it had to be only letters, or number AND letters. Not just numbers. Anyways. The account was marked as deleted, or non existent. Scared me, but whatever, I honestly COULD NOT wait another day. Felt like the day is going forever. I’ve only had the game for about 50 minutes, and I’m just a kid with pants that needs changing.

So, I noticed this stupid ass game is getting to me. I decided to take a break. Get away from this shit for a while. I went on a vacation to Atlantic City to see the fire works over the ocean. The only thing was… I wasn’t there. I was stuck at home watching my bro, because there was no run in the van. Sucks for me, we can’t even go play some game I downloaded. so I said “Fuck the “WII”. I got on my computer and downloaded the game. Usually I would download a .ROM, or .Z64. But I decided to go for a zipped file full of games with those. I did find one. a +15 NES game file with SMB3 in it. I unzipped it and found 5 files for some stupid ass reason. Got pissed. 2 were some random “.xoop” file that I’m stuck on, since I am a computer geek, and never seen a file like this. 1 was a .txt file. The shit in it was a bunch of cyrillic crap that will be almost impossible to translate without fucking shit up. and 1 was a .rom file. This is what I asked for, hoping to have 15 different .rom files. But I guess this will do the job since it’s named “15AU.rom”. I was stuck on what “AU” meant. But I went along. The shit that scared me the most. Was the .exe file. I was frightened. I never seen any thing like what I was looking at! I use a MAC, and all .exe files would has this weird logo and at the top right a green “.exe” on it, indicating it can’t be read on MAC, only PC. I was going to boot up my PC, but the shit that scared me, was that it had an icon. And EXE with an icon on MAC. Hmm. I knew it wasn’t my lucky day. I clicked on it anyways.

What came up was a box. It was as if I was using a windows XP on my MAC. That’s how the box looked. I know I didn’t install anything else on my MAC to run PC crap, because the other few files I have at with that weird .exe logo, The box was just a black background, and it said “Boot rom and press ‘OK’.” I pressed ‘OK’ anyways. and nothing happened but it said “Could not find ROM. Then it repeated the same shit again with booting a rom. The crazy thing was, was we emulator users don’t ‘Boot’ roms. We use them with an emulator. So, I just double clicked the “rom” file, that was named 15AU. I was simply hoping it said “Please chose and application to open this with or check the internet” like it would usually. But it didn’t It booted straight from the .exe. I was shocked at the site of my eyes. It went to the menu of the Wii Shop channel.

So I thought to myself that I was going crazy. I didn’t want to open up my fucking Sixtyforce and open this shit. So I pressed “Alt+Command+ESC” and rebooted it. I threw the files in the trash. and emptied it. My brother asked to play the wii like not even an hour later. I said it was broken. He turned it on anyway. It had, shockingly, 2 new channels. The one channel was named: ONLY WHO. Which was the same name as the .xoop file. One of them at least. And when I clicked it, was came onscreen was: 010110010100111101010101001001110101001001000101001000000100 0111010001010101010001010100010010010100111001000111001000000 10000100100010101010100010101000100010101010010

Instead of something cool, like Wii Sports Resort”s music theme and animation and what not. Surprisingly, the numbers did not go off the screen. It was with a black background, and just numbers. Nothing else. I recognized this. It was binary. I didn’t know how to speak Binary, so I just clicked it. When I clicked it, it said “Start” and nothing else. signifying I couldn’t go back. I started the stupid channel. It was a 5 second channel. It came on, said onscreen ” Function working……. Function Checking…… Operation complete.” And immediately took me to the home menu. My brother is next to me complaining that his Mii character is deleted because of me and crap. I don’t even bother. So I try the next. It was named: Why to? 0100110001110101011010010110011101101001 And that is the binary that appeared. So, I was scared shitless what it did to my Wii menu, or what it did at all. I had the game for 3 days and it won’t stop bothering me. Horrible sleep am I having. The Menu starts back up. It was only a few seconds, but felt as if it was a full minute! When it loaded up. Nothing was there. No Mario, No Wii Shop. No weird channels. It was all weird. What ever was going on, it made me want to destroy the wii. Give it away for a high price. I don’t know. I just don’t want people to go on websites saying they got a haunted game from some garage sail from some creepy dude, and they vanished the next day. That’s all. That would be fucked up. I heard many stories. So. I turned off the Wii, and I turned it back on. the power button stopped working since all this shit started happening. My brother is neer me bickering and annoying me that I’m destroying the family Wii. But what is he to say? He broke things too. This isn’t even my fault. It just turns on by it’s self when I plug it in. It ejects Wii sports resort when it turns on. there is one channel there. a channel named “ONLY WHO”. The Wii Sports Resort game that was in there was extremely scratched. I don’t fucking know how. It was shredded some fucking how. One part is fucking cut in half! I LOVED THAT GAME. But honestly, who gives a shit now? The game turns on and I click the “ONLY WHO” channel. it turns out to be the Wii Shop Channel. I open it. And instead of the little loading screen, it instantly turns on. the sound is glitched. as if it froze. The television wouldn’t turn down. I was pissed it was so loud.None of my activity games were there but the glitched up Mario game. All the game results that came in when I searched was Super Mario Bros. 3. And I even tried downloading it, and nothing happened. Since the points it says I have on there is binary that goes off the screen. and nothing happens. It goes to the download screen for a split second, so quick Mario isn’t even there to jump and says “Download Complete”. I was pissed at everything, and a waste of money I put into this damn Wii console. I’m about to go back to SONY after this shit. I said fuck it. What could possibly happen after I throw my damn Wii off my roof, huh?The shit fell in pieces. I went for my SD card. I put it back in my computer. 30 seconds later, I noticed that was a horrible idea. It ruined my SD and all the roms and other things on it were corrupt. and it fucked up my MAC just opening it. Even a picture of the Wii Shop Channel was there in .jpg form. Well. I decided to trash this computer. I was pissed, and I raised money to get a new one below the table without my parents knowing. As soon as I got my new computer, I went on my board. The guy who said he will talk later (Which was a month ago) never came the next day. His profile even got deleted for I don’t know reason the day he said he will talk. I wonder if he meant it, though. I am now confused. there were a bunch of people who had this horrible problem this year. they were just hidden in the corners of the internet. We would all recall the time it happened. all identical. we all said 4:57, on tuesday. March 24. That’s only if we remembered. Only 3 of us, including me. there are rumour all over the internet of it being a mistake, that Nintendo accidentally uploaded that game, and quickly took it down, because people who claim they downloaded it a minute later at like 4:58 had no problem, and this must have been when Nintendo reuploaded the game. Others still don’t believe us, and each and everyone of us out of destroyed it, or got rid of it. Luckily none of us sold it. No proof of it exists online now. Not even those who had it recorded anything. Now the game it out there still, and Nintendo still has it in store. But for what? Why would they make such a thing? The only shit that made it worse, was when they launched the eShop for 3DS. it only made my life worse in 2012. I wouldn’t believe what I was seeing…………..

Credit To – Aflysokat