Nitpick Archive 12

Welcome to the reboot of Ned's Nitpicks. I have decided to start fresh here on the Pasta Archives, as well as go through the stories I already did. I'm starting this reboot with Sonic.exe, a much hated, shitty story written by an idiot who had a tantrum over this piece of fail being deleted.

I'm not sure what to do about my old Nitpicks. I'm considering keeping them archived, yet I'm also considering making them blog posts again.

I'm a total Sonic the Hedgehog fan much like everyone else, I like the newer games

Because J.C. doesn't understand how punctuation works, it sounds like he is saying everyone is a "total Sonic the Hedgehog fan". Not only would this be wrong, but so would his conjecture that everyone likes the newer games. Most of the Sonic fans actually hate the newer games, with the only memorable Sonic game in recent history being Sonic Mania, which was little else than an update of the classics. I'm pretty sure J.C.'s favorite Sonic game at the time this was written was Sonic '06.

but I don't mind playing the classics.

Oh yeah, those classics just sucked sooooo bad! I hated their badass music, fun fast-speed game play, beautiful graphics, and interesting level designs! I like the newer ones where Sonic walks around cities and talks to human beings with long-ass cutscenes! Literally NO ONE thinks the newer games are better than the classics! The only person stupid enough to think Sonic '06 is better than Sonic the Hedgehog 3 & Knuckles, is someone who would write a piece of fail like this story!

I don't think I've ever played glitchy or hacked games before

If you've played Sonic '06 (which I assume is your favorite game), then you HAVE played a glitchy game. Also, how do you not know rather or not if you ever played a game that was glitchy or hacked?! Then again, I don't expect much from the writer of this "masterpiece".

though I don't think I want to play any after the experience I had...

"I don't want to play a hacked or glitchy game because of an experience I had with a haunted one" great logic there, dipshit! Also, to some extent, every game has glitches, so you might as well become Amish at this point.

It started on a nice summer afternoon, I was playing Sonic Unleashed (I liked how you get to explore the towns in it)

You also liked looking at Sonic the Werehog's butt!

until I noticed, out of my peripheral vision, that the mailman had arrived and put something in my mailbox as usual and left.

So your eyes stayed glued to the screen, and you decided to watch this out of your peripheral vision instead of actually moving your eyeballs away from Sonic the Werehog's "glorious" ass! Nice!

I paused my game to go see what I got in the mail...

"Final notice, final notice, final notice, your child has been accepted to a special needs school, Hey! A package!"

'''The only thing in the Mailbox was a CD case for computers and a note. I took it inside.'''

Was it a jewel case? Was it a CD sleeve? Was it one of those DVD-Rom cases? Who knows? Apparently J.C. didn't, or else he would give more detail. Also, most types of cases aren't specifically for a singular medium. Not only do we have missing detail in this sentence, but we also have a gigantic error.

I looked at the note first and realized it was from my dear friend Kyle (Let's just call him that)

Yeah, give him an alias! If we knew his first name, which is most likely shared by billions of other people on this earth, we would be able to find out who he is and harass him! So far this story has just been one stupid action after another, and it does not get any better.

'''whom I hadn't heard from in 2 weeks. I know that because I recognized his handwriting, though what was weird is how it looked'''

Maybe it wasn't from Kyle, then. Maybe it wasn't even for you. Maybe it was pirated pornography your dad's friend sent him.

it looked badly written and scratchy and somewhat difficult to read, as if Kyle was having a hard time writing it down and did it in a hurry.

That's because, like you, he is a special needs child, and his penmanship is weak.

"Tom,

'''I can't take it anymore, I had to get rid of this thing somehow before it was too late, and I was hoping you'd do it for me. I can't do it, he’s after me, and if you don't destroy this CD, he'll come after you too, he's too fast for me....'''

Why didn't you just destroy the CD instead of writing a love letter to your boyfriend? Every time I read this, I can't help but imagine him being chased through his house, writing this down while Benny Hill music plays.

Please Tom, destroy this god-forsaken disc before he comes after you too, it's too late for me.

Apparently not if you had time to write a note, put the disc in a case (a questionable action when you want it destroyed, not protected in a case), put it in an envelope, write Tommy-boy's address on the envelope, and put it in your mailbox/take it to your post office.

Destroy the disc, and you'll destroy him

THEN YOU SHOULD HAVE DESTROYED IT INSTEAD OF WASTING TIME WRITING LETTERS, YOU FOOL!

'''Well, that was certainly weird. Even though Kyle IS my best friend and I haven't seen him in 2 weeks, I didn't do what he asked me. I didn't think that a simple gaming disc would do anything bad to him'''

First off, where did Kyle get the disc? Second, yes a disc could do something bad to a child. It could contain some kind of shocking images, videos, or hardcore pornography. If not any of those, it could have some kind of virus, or put him in contact with someone who blackmails him into doing bad things like the Momo challenge.

after all it's just a game right?

Literally no one before you said it was a game.

Boy, was I wrong about that...

You were also wrong when you said that this story had millions of fans.

ANY way, I looked at the disc and it looks like any ordinary computer CD-R disc

I'm not going to waste my time pointing out that SEGA burned their prototypes on regular CD-Rs, or the fact that CD-Rs are also used to burn Audio CDs and VCDs.

except it had black marker on it written "SONIC.EXE", and it was much unlike Kyle's handwriting, meaning that he must've gotten it from someone else

You could have saved us a few seconds by not mentioning that it didn't look like Kyle's handwriting at all, but whatever.

like a pawn shop or eBay.

Yeah, because apparently pawn shops sell pirated goods. That's TOTALLY NOT A GR8 WAY to get shut down, U GUIZE!

When I saw "SONIC" on the writing of the CD, I was actually excited and wanted to play it, since I'm a a BIG Sonic fan.

Not only does he assume it is a game, he also assumes that it has something to do with Sonic the Hedgehog. I used to have a disc burning software called Sonic.

'''I went up to my room and turned on my computer and put the disc in and installed the game. When the title screen popped up I noticed that it was the first Sonic game, I was like "Awesome!" Because like I said earlier I liked the classics.'''

No, you said you "don't mind" them. There is a huge difference. It is like he knows what he said wrong, but didn't want to bother to fix it because he apparently wanted this Shitpasta to be longer than it had to be. Either that or he was just too lazy to fix it.

The first thing I noticed that was out of place was when I pressed start, there's was a split second when I saw the title image turned into something much different, something that I now consider horrifying, before cutting to black.

Your slow reflexes indicate that you have some sort of mental setbacks.

I remember what the image looked like in that split second before the game cut to black; The sky had darkened, the title emblem was rusted and ruined, the SEGA 1991 was now instead SEGA 666, and the water had turned red, like blood, except it looked hyper-realistic.

"Yeah! There's no way that was intentional! That all had to be a coincidental glitch, that's all!" Dammit, you're stupid!

But the freakiest thing that was in that split second frame was Sonic, his eyes were pitch black and bleeding with two glowing red dots staring RIGHT AT ME

How can you tell if they aren't actually eyes? Also, CLICHE MADNESS!

'''and his smile had stretched wider up to the edge of his face. I was rather disturbed about that image when I saw it, though I figured that it was just a glitch and forgot about it.'''

I honestly don't know how to comment on this, so I'm just going to simply say that you're stupid and move on.

'''After it cut to black it stayed like that for about 10 seconds or so. And then another weird thing happened, the save file select from Sonic the Hedgehog 3 popped up, and I was like "WTF? What's this doing in the first Sonic game?",'''

But yet you never wondered the same thing about the satanic imagery on the title screen. Also, who exactly said it was Sonic 1? At that time, the only legal port of Sonic 1 on PC, as far as I know, was on Sega Smash Pack.

'''anyway, then I notice something off, the background was the dark cloudy sky of the Bad Stardust Speedway level from Sonic CD, and there were only three save files. The music was that creepy Caverns of Winter music from Earthbound'''

The fact that it is using music from another game should be another red flag that this is not an official game.

'''only it was extended and seemed to have been in reverse. And the image for the save file where you see a preview of the level you're on is just red static for all three files.'''

RED AND STATIC IS SCURY!

'''What freaked me out more was the character select, it showed only Tails, Knuckles and to my surprise, Dr. Robotnik! Now I was sure that something was up'''

Really? That's what makes you come to this conclusion? Not the satanic imagery, not the save files on what you think is the first game, not the PC port, but fucking Robotnik being playable?!

I mean, how can you play as Robotnik in a classic Sonic game, for crying out loud?

There actually is a hack of the first Sonic the Hedgehog game where you can play Robotnik. Just sayin'.

That's when I realized that this wasn't a glitchy game, it was a hacked game.

Genius!

Yeah it definitely looked hacked, it was really creepy, but as a smart gamer

> Brushes obviously intentional imagery as a glitch > Doesn't know that this game was only ported to PC as part of a collection of Genesis games > Doesn't care about music ripped from somewhere else > comes to the conclusion it is fake simply because Robotnik is playable > "Smart gamer"

Yeah, right!

I wasn't scared (or at least I tried not to be)

Backbone of a freaking worm!

'''I told myself that it was just a hacked game and there's nothing wrong with that. Anyways, shaking off the creeped out feeling I picked File 1 and chose Tails and when I selected and got started. The game froze for about 5 seconds and I heard a creepy pixelated laugh that sounded an awful lot like that Kefka guy from Final Fantasy before cutting to black.'''

SUPR SKURY!

The screen stayed black for about 10 seconds or more, then it showed the typical level title thing,

"Typical level title thing". It's like he wants us to think he is stupid!

'''except the simplistic shapes were different shades of red and the text showed only "HILL, ACT 1". The screen faded in and the level title vanished revealing Tails in the Green Hill Zone from Sonic 1'''

I'm surprised you didn't comment something stupid like "Wait a minute, Tails wasn't in Sonic 1!"

the music was different though, it sounded like a peaceful melody in reverse.

If it's not a song you recognize, how do you know it is in reverse?

Anyway I started playing and had Tails start running like you would in any of the classic Sonic games

Except the ones where he either doesn't show up, or just stands still.

what was odd was that as Tails was running along the level there was nothing but flat ground and a few trees for 5 minutes

"I used my internal stopwatch that everyone in Shittycreepypastaland has, instead of trying to count how many miles he was walking!". At this point I would just shut the damn thing off and play a real Sonic game.

'''that was when the peaceful music started to lower down into slow deep tones very slowly as I kept going. I suddenly saw something and I stopped to see what it was; it was one of the small animals lying dead on the ground bleeding'''

POINTLESS VIOLENCE MAKES IT SCARY, U GUIZE!

Tails had a shocked and saddened look on his face that I never saw him have before, so I had him move along

I would call him out for being unsympathetic, but Yuriofwind did it better.

'''and he kept that worried look on his face. As he kept moving I saw more dead animals as Tails moved past them looking more and more worried as the music lowers and he moves past more dead animals,'''

There's a limitation on how many changes you can make to a sprite his size, buddy!

I was shocked to see how they all died, they looked like somebody killed them in rather gruesome ways; a squirrel was hanged on a tree with what appeared to be his entrails hanging out, a bunny had all four of his limbs torn off and a duck had his eyes gouged out and his throat slit.

GOR IS SCRY, GUYZZZ!

'''I felt sick to my stomach when I saw this massacre and apparently so did Tails. After a few more seconds there were no more animals and the music seemed to have stopped, I still kept Tails to continue.'''

"I still kept Tails to continue". Do you even English, mate?

'''After a minute passed after the music stopped, Tails was running up a hill and then he stopped, it wasn't until I saw why; Sonic was there on the other side of the screen with his back against Tails with his eyes closed. Tails looked happy to see Sonic but then his smile faltered, obviously noticing that Sonic wasn't responding to him, if not acting as if he was totally oblivious of Tails' presence.'''

Maybe he is ignoring him because he made him wait so damn long? Or maybe he knows that he is being played by an idiot and wants no association.

Tails walked slowly toward Sonic, and I noticed that I wasn't even moving my keyboard to make him move, so this had to have been a cut scene.

You don't move your keyboard to control a character, you press a key, you fool!

Suddenly I began to have a growing feel of dread as Tails walked closer to Sonic to get his attention, I felt that Tails was in danger and something bad was going to happen.

You know what story used "sense of dread" better? BEN Drowned. Also, you would feel Tails is in danger if he was having fun at Disneyland!

I heard faint static growing louder

STATIC IS SOOOO SCURY!

'''as Tails was but inches away from Sonic and stopped and stuck his hand out to touch him. That foreboding feeling in my gut was growing stronger and I felt the urge to tell Tails to get away from Sonic as the static grew louder.'''

If this game terrorizes you so much, you have the option to shut it off. Just sayin', bro!

Suddenly in a split second I saw Sonic's eyes open and they were black with those red glowing dots, just like that title image, thought there wasn't a smile.

I'm surprised you didn't think it was just a glitch!

'''When that happened the screen turned black and the static sound was off. It stayed black for about 7 seconds and then white text appeared forming a message, saying, "Hello. Do you want to play with me?"'''

If Sonic said that, you'd better believe J.C. wants to "play" with him.

At this point I was creeped out, I didn't want to continue with the game

Then don't!

'''but my curiosity got the better of me when I was taken to a different level with the level title now saying "HIDE AND SEEK". This time I was in the Angel Island level from Sonic 3 and it looked like everything was on fire.'''

That actually isn't unusual, the second level of that stage literally is on fire! Then again, I don't expect you to know that, mr. I-don't-mind-the-classics,-but-I-beat-off-to-Sonic-the-Werehog's-glorious-furry-butt!

'''Tails looked as though he was scared out of his wits this time. He actually looked at me and made frantic gestures to me as if he wanted to get out of the area he was in as fast as possible.'''

Me, me, me, me, me! Even if Tails could break the fourth wall, he wouldn't because no one, not even an AI character, wants anything to do with you!

'''I was starting to get freaked out by this...I mean Tails was actually breaking the fourth wall, trying to tell me to get him out of there. So I pressed down on the arrow key as hard as I could and made him run as fast as he could, a pixelated version of that creepy theme when you meet Shadow at the ARK as Robotnik from SA2 was playing as I made Tails trek through the desolate forest, trying to help him escape from whatever he was trying to run from.'''

He wanted you to finish the game as soon as possible so he didn't have to be controlled by a complete moron.

'''Suddenly I heard that creepy laugh again... that awful, Kefka laugh... right after 10 seconds have passed as I helped Tails run through the forest, and then I started seeing flashes of Sonic popping everywhere on the screen, again with those black and red eyes.'''

Cliches awe soo scawy! Poow wittwe J.C.!

'''The music changed to that suspenseful drowning jingle as I see Sonic behind Tails slowly gaining up on him FLYING; Sonic wasn't running, he was actually FLYING! '''

That's what we assumed when you said flying, but whatever, dumb-dumb!

The flying pose his sprite was making looked very similar to Metal Sonic's flying pose in Sonic CD, except it was just Sonic and he had the black and red eyes again, only

THIS time

Yes, my dear reader, that shitty paragraph spacing mid-sentence is actually part of the story.

'''he had the most deranged looking grin on his face, he looked as though he was enjoying the torment he was giving the poor little fox as he gained up on him. Suddenly when Tails tripped (another cut scene) the music stopped and Sonic vanished.'''

Sonic had no idea what he was going to do to Tails, who he did not think he would catch up to, so he vanished to avoid making himself look foolish.

Tails laid there and started crying for 15 seconds.

You were crying longer because you're a bigger wuss!

The scene was rather upsetting to watch and I kind of teared up myself.

Little do you realize we are all laughing at you and calling you a wussy because of this!

But then Sonic appeared right in front of Tails and Tails looked up in horror.

"I figured out what to do to you, so I'm back!"

Blood started to come down those blackened eyes of Sonic's as a grin slowly grew from his face as he looked down at the horrified fox, I could do nothing but watch.

Yeah, because shutting off the computer and doing something productive apparently wasn't a viable option.

'''Just in a split second Sonic lunged at Tails right before the screen went black, there was a loud screeching noise that only lasted 5 seconds. The text returned only this time it said "You're too slow, want to try again?" and then that god-awful laugh came with it. I was so shocked by what had happened...did Sonic murder Tails?'''

Since this is a shitpasta where things are thrown in for the shock value, I'm surprised it wasn't rape!

'''No, he couldn't have... He and Tails are supposed to be best friends, right? Why did Sonic do that to him?'''

You were too busy crying into your pillow and probably punching it to come to the conclusion that this might not even be Sonic.

I shook the shock off

Jesus, dude, you need medication! "Yeah, I saw this horrible thing, but thankfully my ADD kicked in and now I'm focusing on a raindrop that is sliding down my window!"

as I was brought back to the character select, the save file that had Tails was different; Tails was no longer in the box itself but in the TV screen itself, which was flickering with that red static, Tails' expression scared me, his eyes were black and bleeding, his orange fur had gone black and he had an expression of anguish on his face, Trying to ignore it I picked Knuckles next.

What the fuck does he think he is accomplishing with all this "Yeah, I brushed it off" shit?

The laugh came again and the screen cut to black again and stayed there for another 10 seconds, this time the level said "YOU CAN'T RUN".

You can't run, but you can turn your computer off. Well, no, apparently not, because you're too stupid to do so.

I was really freaked out by now, I couldn't really tell if this was a glitch, or a hack

YOU FUCKING IMBECILE! HOW THE FUCK DO YOU THINK THIS WHOLE THING IS "JUST A GLITCH"?! ARE YOU REALLY THAT GODDAMN STUPID, IT'S OBVIOUSLY A HACK! Christ, you're an idiot!

or some kind of sick twisted joke...

No, most likely it is just a 'scary" hack created for fun, but because you're the dumbest fucking moron to ever disgrace your family by merely existing, you're not sure what to make of it!

But despite my fear of what happened next, I kept playing.

"HURR DURR TOMMY POOPED HIS PANTS AGAIN, MOMMY! GET TOMMY MORE CHICKEN TENDIES!"

'''The next level looked much different, it had the ground of the Scrap Brain zone, but the sky background looked like the main menu; it had the dark reddish cloudy sky. But it was the music that creeped me out the most: It sounded like Giygas' theme right after you beat Pokey in Earthbound. I also noticed that Knuckles looked afraid just like Tails did, though not as much, more rather he looked a little unnerved. He broke the fourth wall just like Tails and looked as if he wasn't sure about going on, but I made him move anyway.'''

"HURR DURR, MOMMY, WHERE TOMMY CHICKIE-TENDIES?!"

'''He ran down the straight pathway in this dark level, and as he did the screen started to flicker red static a couple times and then that maddening laugh came again. Then after a few seconds of running I notice several bloodstains on the metallic ground, I felt a growing sense of fear again thinking something horrible is going to happen to Knuckles.'''

No shit, Sherlock! I already came to that conclusion the moment I read that he was a playable character!

He looked nauseated walking down this blood-stained road, but I still kept him going.

Apparently medium sized 16-bit sprites can show emotion.

'''Suddenly as Knuckles ran, Sonic appeared right in front of him with those black and red eyes and then red static appeared again, when the static vanished showing nothing but black screen with text saying "FOuNd YOu!", I was now scared, Sonic found Knuckles already?! What was going on?!'''

They could tell you plainly what is going on and you still wouldn't figure it out!

'''Anyway red static came again and then I was back to the level, Knuckles looked like he was panicking, and Sonic was nowhere to be found. And this time that high-pitched squealing from the Silent Hill 1's final boss was playing.'''

It's like he can't actually think of anything that looks scary, so he tries to give this game a scary "soundtrack" to compensate.

'''Was this some kind of boss battle with Sonic? I hoped to God it wasn't, honestly.'''

"I just saw him do some bad stuff, I don't want to fight him!" says the "smartest" dipshit in the world!

Suddenly Sonic appeared right behind Knuckles

That doesn't sound sexual at all!

in what appeared to be pixelated black smoke, I made Knuckles turn and then punch Sonic

Apparently Mr. "Smart Gamer" doesn't know that you can't punch people in the original Sonic games. Then again, despite saying it was like the old games, he is probably imagining this game looks like his favorite, Sonic '06.

but Sonic vanished in black pixelated smoke

Of course it's pixelated, it's 16 bits you dumb fuck!

'''before I could even land a hit, that terrible laugh went off again. Then Sonic appeared behind Knuckles again and then I made him punch again'''

You don't even know what kind of game you're supposed to be playing, do you? No, you don't. You're imagining this is insert-shitty-new-Sonic-game-title-here. The only reason you said it was like Sonic 1 is because you probably think that the darned old classics are scary because of how bad you think they are!

'''and Sonic vanished again laughing. Knuckles was panicking even more, and even I felt like I was going crazy'''

Sounds to me like you already have some sort of mental health problems to begin with.

'''Sonic was practically playing with us, he was playing a sick twisted little mind game with me and Knuckles... Another cut scene played'''

Being able to tell a character's emotions... "Cut scenes".... Ability to fight in a game where you can only move, jump, and spindash... Yep, J.C. is imagining this one of his shitty new Sonic games! Confirmed!

as Knuckled fell to his knees

Great, more eroticism.

and clutched his head sobbing, I felt his agony, Sonic was actually driving us BOTH crazy.

Then turn off the game, numb-nuts!

'''And then in a split second Sonic lunged at Knuckles and the screen went black with another distorted screeching noise that lasted for at least 3 seconds. Another text message appeared, "So many souls to play with, so little time... would you agree?"'''

Please, take Tom next!

'''What the hell... Just what is going on? I started to think Sonic was actually trying to talk to me through the game...'''

You're obviously just paranoid because that doesn't sound too fourth-wall breaking, but whatever! It's all about you, isn't it Tom the Dumbass?

But I was too scared to think that.

Apparently you thought of it somewhere down the line, or you wouldn't have wrote it. Also, "iT wAs 'ScArY' iN BeN, sO iT iS sCaRy HeRe!"

I was brought back to the main menu and this time the second file box had Knuckles in the TV screen, his red fur had darkened to a reddish grey, his dreadlocks

"Dreadlocks?" Knuckles is Jamaican now, apparently.

'''were dripping with blood and his eyes were black and bleeding too, and he had a look of sadness on his face. I began to think that those are the actual characters trapped in those TV screens on the save files'''

Dude, you come up with the stupidest shit!

'''but I couldn't believe it... I didn't want to believe it...'''

And I don't want to believe that humanity has sunk so low that someone could actually come up with a story this shitty.

'''So I shut off the game and took a break. I took a nap'''

One of the nurses from the special-ed school you attend told you it was nappy time. Seriously, why a nap? I'll tell you why, because that was a plot point in BEN, and J.C. thinks that he can rip it off to make his shitty story scary. Seriously, who the fuck takes a nap right in the middle of an engaging game? Especially one that short!

'''wish I hadn't, 'cause I then began to have the most disturbing nightmare, I was in pitch black darkness, though I was under the light given off by a lamp that hung high above my head. I could hear the cries of Knuckles and Tails nearby. They were saying stuff like, "Help us..." and "Why did you give us to him?" and "Run away, before he gets you too..."'''

> Blames him for letting Sonic "get" you. > Tells him to run away before he is taken.

Doesn't sound like they're too angry at him!

'''Their cries died out as I then heard Sonic laugh, his laugh... it sounded a lot like the distorted Kefka laugh.'''

If it's Kefka's laugh then why are you saying it's Sonic's?

"You're a lot fun to play with kid, just like your friend Kyle, though he didn't last long..."

Sonic sounds like a pedophile.

'''I was scared and looking around for the source of the voice... "Won't be long now until you join him and all my other friends..." I saw him walking toward me, flickering in and out in several directions... "You can't run, kid. You're in my world now. Just like the others..." When he grabbed me and I saw his bleeding black and red-eyed, grinning face, I woke up with a fright.'''

This nightmare was a pointless plot point ripped off of a better story.

'''After a couple of hours I decided to continue playing the game. I don’t know why, but I had to know, I had to figure out why this was happening... So I turned on the computer, turned on the game and selected Robotnik next. I still thought that was wacky, playing as Robotnik'''

You're a dumbass so you probably thought that it was the most outrageous thing about this game.

but anyway the level title appeared again and this time it said "...", which I found really freaky.

You would find it "freaky" if this level was just Robotnik running through a happy, flowery field under a bright shining sun!

This time I was in some kind of hallway, didn't really look like it was from any of the classic Sonic games, though it has the pixelated style

16 bit does not mean pixelated, you stupid monkey!

'''the floor was shiny and checkered, the walls were a dark greyish purple with animated candlelight’s and a few dark bloodstains here and there, and there was a dark red curtain hanging above on the top part of the screen. Every 12 seconds or so that red curtain sways very slowly, but whenever you're playing the game you can barely see it move.'''

Then how do you know it's moving, you stupid shithead?!

The music was oddly pleasant, a piano playing a rather sad yet peaceful song, but I knew better, this was the song that played in Hill act 1, only it wasn't in reverse.

Plot twist: it is in reverse, and the Hill level was playing it forward. Also, if it is on a piano and it is playing backwards, there is a good chance you're not going to be able to tell the difference, but whatever!

Robotnik didn't look entirely nervous like Tails and Knuckles did, but he did have a suspicious look on his face as if he was just a bit paranoid.

However the fuck you can tell...

'''He did a little animation when I just left him standing, he turns his head to the left and then to the right at least twice and then shrugs at me, as if he has no idea where he was or what was going on. Even though I was scared outta my mind about what was going to happen, I had Robotnik continue onward. He did his usual running animation (You know, when you've beaten him at the end of a classic Sonic game and you chase him) as we continued going through the hallway.'''

This whole thing feels like filler to expand your otherwise paper thin story.

Then I stop at a long flight of stairs leading downward, now I was nervous, even Robotnik seemed unsure of himself, though I pressed onward.

"I'm Tom, I can tell what a character is or is not feeling!" Fuck you, Tom!

'''As I led Robotnik down the stairs, I noticed that the walls have gotten darker and more reddish; the red torches are now an eerie blue. Then we landed onto another hallway,'''

I like how he says "we" like they're holding hands and walking close together, or some shit.

'''this one was longer than the last one (or at least it felt like it) and then we headed down another flight of stairs down, this one was much longer, took at least 1 full minute. And then I heard that horrid Kefka laugh again and then the music slowly faded until it was quiet, as it did the walls turned more dark red and the torches were a black flame now.'''

Boring!

When Robotnik landed onto the 3rd hallway, I noticed he now looked really creeped out, though he tried to hide it, I couldn't blame him, I was scared too.

No, he wasn't. You were afraid and shitting your pants, and you're trying to make it sound like he was afraid too. News flash, you already embarrassed yourself by being part of this story!

'''Suddenly, Sonic popped right in front of Robotnik the same way he did Knuckles and then red static. The red static lasted for about 15 second and then it showed me a most unpleasant image...'''

More like "it showed me a most cliched image..."

The image showed a hyper-realistic of Sonic standing in the darkness where you can only see his face while his head and torso faded into black, and when I say hyper-realistic, I mean like he looked so real you could actually see the lines in his blue fur, as if you could actually feel the fur if you touched the screen.

Cool! 3D furry porn!

His face...oh god, he had the most horrifying smile I had ever seen.

This was clearly added for dramatization in an otherwise boring story.

And that's saying something considering I saw that image at the start of the game.

More filler...

'''His eyes are wide and black and once again crying blood (Which also looked hyper-realistic) and there were two small glowing red dots in those black eyes staring RIGHT AT ME, as if staring into my mind. His grin was wide and demonic, it literally stretched to the sides of his face like a Cheshire Cat except Sonic had fangs, VERY SHARP fangs, much like the Werehog's teeth except more vicious-looking, somewhat yellowish and from the look of it, he had stains of blood and small bits of flesh on his lips and fangs as if he ate some animal.'''

It would be at this point that anyone with a brain would assume that this is a jumpscare game. Unfortunately, we have the biggest fucktard on the planet as a protagonist who thinks that this might just be a glitch!

I stared at that gruesome image for a good 30 seconds, never taking my eyes off it, I felt as if he was actually looking at me, smiling at me...

That's because you have a god complex. You think every character in this game is trying to communicate with you, and now you think that Sonic is smiling at you.

that face, it just took 10 seconds for it to etch itself into my brain for good.

Well, you said you stared at it for thirty seconds, so no wonder it's etched into your "brain". You're lucky you didn't fry your eyeballs by refusing to blink.

Then the screen flickered with red static again 3 times, and on the 3rd time I heard the Kefka laugh, except this time it sounded distorted, demonic even...

This story has more sounds than visuals.

It went back to the image again except this time there was the text again though it was messed up, but it was pretty much one of the most horrifying things I looked at since I had this game...

"I AM GOD."

"WOW! That's the most scariest saying ever!" I say sarcastically. Seriously, you think this is scary? No, Sonic, you're not God, you are a hedgehog! I mean, J.C. clearly belongs to a made-up religion in which you are God, but the rest of us know that you're the mascot for a failed video game company.

'''It was when I read that message while looking at Sonic when it hit me, I realized right there and then. This Sonic was a monster, a pure evil, sadistic, all-powerful, nightmarish, demented monster...'''

I want you all to breathe this in for a moment. Sonic went around tormenting and killing people, but Tommy comes to the realization he is evil by him saying "I AM GOD!". Maybe Tom thinks God is evil for making him retarded.

and all of his victims, including Tails, Knuckles, Robotnik and possibly Kyle, are just his little toys, and the game is the very gateway into his chaotic, nightmarish world and the very Hell his victims are trapped in.

It's just a jumpscare game, you overreacting moo cow!

Suddenly in an actual split second I screamed as Sonic lunged at the screen screeching loudly with his mouth wide open to an unnatural length revealing nothing but a literally spiraling abyss of pure darkness before the red static came again, this time much louder and distorted, so loud that it hurt my ears, I yelled and grabbed my ears as the red static screeched for a good 7 seconds.

Or you could have just saved yourself the embarrassment by turning down your speakers.

'''Then it stopped and showed nothing but black screen. As I sat there staring at the black screen, one last text came up. "Ready for Round 2, Tom?" The Kefka laugh, now sounding more clear as if Sonic was right behind me'''

I think Kefka's name comes up more in this story than Sonic's.

'''played again 3 times as I looked at that text in shock and confusion. Then I got booted back to the main menu and this time the third save file had a TV image of Robotnik in the same, tormented state as Tails and Knuckles; Robotnik's skin turned a dull grey, his mustache drooped and had blackened, his glasses broke and blood is coming from them and he had a mere dead like expression on his face.'''

Their "dead" expressions are more lively than yours, you empty headed lolcow!

I looked at Tails, Knuckles and Robotnik and I cried a bit

You're a wussy. I'm sure if wetting your pants wasn't considered embarrassing, you would probably have done so throughout the story!

I pitied them for the agony they're going through,

They're characters in a video game, if you want someone to feel sorry for, why don't you feel sorry for people who are actually suffering? Do you know that there are things like abuse, poverty, starvation, abandonment, and-whatever-else in the real world? Nope, fuck the starving kids, I'm crying over fucking video game characters! Dumbest fuck in Shittycreepypastaland.

'''they were forever trapped within the game, forever tormented by that horrid hedgehog, and always will be. Then the computer shut itself off, I couldn't turn it back on no matter what I did.'''

I hope your dad beats the fuck out of you for destroying his computer.

I sat there for maybe 25 seconds

Retard...

'''horrified by what had just happened... Sonic is the very embodiment of evil'''

Of course he is, Sega made him!

'he tortures people who play his game

Playing the shitty new Sonic games are like torture, so you got that right at least.

in more ways than one and then when he gets bored he drags you into the game, literally drags you to Hell

The author writes, sitting in his house which clearly is not actual Hell.

'''where he can play with you always, as his toy.... I can't get the game outta my computer.'''

Well, that's what we assumed when you said it would not turn on!

I think it's stuck in there,

Oh, you mean the physical CD! You need to specify on those things, Tommy!

'''but at least I managed to turn it back on now. After I sat there for 25 seconds'''

Wow, your computer boots up fast! Mine takes about 15 minutes, no joking!

'''I heard a voice right behind me, like a whisper... "Try to keep this interesting for me, Tom." I turned around to see where the voice came from, and what I saw made me scream... Sitting on my bed... staring right at me... ... Was a Sonic plushie, smiling with bloodstains under its eyes.'''

And that's how this disaster of a shitty story ends. No climax, no resolve, just a plushie (real "scary", by the way) which is a non-threatening object, appearing out of nowhere and doing apparently nothing. I'm guessing nothing bad happened to Tom because he had enough time to write this shitty story. Seriously, out of all the objects in the world, he decides to embody himself as a fucking plushie!

Thank you all for reading, and be sure to check the Ned's Nitpicks Index every Friday for more pointless ranting.